K. Michele CAN'T DO THIS

MUSIC  has always been my escape so in light of all the bullsyht i went thru in 2012 listening to music and enjoying it has brought safely into 2013 with a smile on my face BUT TONIGHT this song "i just cant do this by k.michele has given me life & life more abundantly THIS HEFFA SAID " I WAS THE HAND, U WERE THE GLOVE , TELL ME WHAT DID U DO WITH THE MAN THAT I LOVE, USE TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I COULD FLY, NOW ALL I WANNA DO IS LAY DOWN AND DIE' AMEN AMEN AMEN  ...the smile was short lived, MUTHA FUCKERS ARE SERIOUSLY CRAZY ESP THE WOMEN IN MY LIFE ... i was so BLESSED to become a mother in 2012 and its my best accomplisment so far, my daughter who now with some weight gain, the spitting image of her beautiful mother ....she's mending the broken pieces of my heart, she's the only thing holding me together, moving me forward and giving off the engery and love i need to survive ..............now as for her father Well thats something totally different in every aspect, no man other than my own father has brought me to such dark places, constantly telling me one thing and living another, dismissing my ass at 5months pregnant, continuing to criticize my every action all while never wanting to be judged for anything, never an apology, always an excuse for behavior or a reaction from whatever i've done ...i just cant seem to figure out if im ever gonna get what i feel i deserve form someone who claims to love me, for once i need at least one person who says they love me TO FUCKING ACT LIKE IT, HELL DONT EVER SAY IT JUST SHOW ME AND IM FINE, im so ready to take my lil blessing to an undisclosed location and live life away from any and every person i've ever known ..just me & my blessing starting fresh and new and having the luxury of not dealing with all this foolish ass ppl ...it troubles me becuz every woman in my life except one thinks tht i should just deal with whatever this mf decides to dish out, its clear to me that men have hurt and tarnished these women to a point of no return for them to even suggest that i just look over the hurt & pain of everything without even a half ass apology or fuck that just some real life acknowledgement that the shyt even ever happened but no everyone is either sure i'll never find the love I REQUIRE or they are so bitter within themselves that they didnt just deal with the bs and make it work for themselves, either way im not fucking going - i always forgive, i alway have to let go, i always look over bring treated like shyt from ppl tryna be the "good' person well fuck that & them not in 2013 ...I seriously pray my daughter isnt treated like i was ever from any of the ppl in my life, i would give these ppl my heart out my chest if they needed it but there is not a soul around that feel that way about me and its time for me to not give a fuck anymore, my heart cannot be broken if i refuse to have one but becuz i have a daughter i have to have a heart, an esp big heart becuz shes gonna need me ....im over the fake bull, the back & forth ....my entire life is about my baby and i truly dont give a flying fuck about anybody or anything else!!!! now back to my jams as i fold my lil ones close and plan our escape route